Just listen to mommy!

(I posted this on the Single Mom's Group on CafeMom, but thought I would vent here too)

*sigh* This is one of those days that I don't want to be a mom, especially a stay at home one. I guess I had a rose-colored view of what it would be like to stay home 24/7 with my girls. I pictured us doing crafts even though I'm craft-challenged, going to play groups, visiting the zoo, children's museum and the like. Instead, I am stuck home with them most days because I have limited funds and frankly, there is not much to do in this small town (I lived in a metro area prior to my separation). Anyway, I digress. Last night, my 8 month old screamed and screamed for about 20 minutes for no apparent reason then nursed for about 10 seconds and passed out. This meant a late night, rushed dinner and no patience. Then today, my oldest decides to defy me at every turn and ask "Why?" to everything that I ask her to do. You can only put a kid in time out so many times before it stops working. Kids just know how to punch the buttons sometimes. I'm tired and cranky and yet, I can't run away, even for a few hours. I'm stuck...
That said, I give MAJOR kudos to the SAHMs who do this and have been doing it successfully for years. I admire you all and wonder how you stand it! True, some can afford to find and pay for outlets for their kids (preschool, tumbling and the like), so they get some time to themselves but still, I'm sure those times are few and far between. Even those who are not SAHMs, you're still the primary caregiver and disciplinarian. Doesn't that get old? I would hate to replay what I say to my oldest every day 'cause I'm sure it's a lot of "No", "Stop that!" and "Not now"s. I feel guilty but sometimes, I just want to snap! I want to be an ostrich and bury my head in the sand. Not to have to hear "MOMMA...!" 5,000 times a day would be lovely, not to have to attempt to decode a baby's cries, not to be pulled in a million directions at the same time. Right now, I would kill for a job, for a little escape. Then, at the same time, I know I will miss being home, that I will miss precious moments and milestones.

Anyway, thanks for letting me vent. Life would be so much simplier if kids would just do what we tell them, huh?

Happy St. Patrick's Day

Since we all probably have a little bit o' Irish in us...


Courtesy of MsTags.com

We are going downtown to show our love for the Irish by watching the parade and eating some brats!

**Update on the parade** We had a lovely time. It was in the 70's during the parade, which lasted all of about 15 minutes. Caitlin sat on the curb watching the floats, cars and horses go by and catching candy that was thrown down. She managed to get about 6 pieces so it was a mini-Halloween to her. I saw an old high school home ec teacher who handed me a paper crane, symbol of peace. I guess I haven't changed much, because, after almost 11 years, she still recognized me! After the parade, we walked a few blocks down to the Coffee Trader for Italian Cream Sodas (Coconut for me, strawberry for Caitlin) and then walked back to the car. Caitlin spent a majority of the day outside since it was absolutely gorgeous. I cleaned out my car and then opened the house up to let the fresh air in. It was a wonderful day!

Sampling of pictures

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No sick days

*scratch, scratch, cough, cough* That is me. It seems that I have come down with a little cold/ear ache of some sort. It started yesterday with a slight irritation in my throat and now, it REALLY hurts to swallow, drink, etc. I'm also really hot and dizzy. As much as I'd love to sleep all day and wallow in self-pity...moms don't get sick days. So, I must plow on. I have Weight Watchers tonight though I'm not sure if I will gather up enough energy for the 30 minute drive to the meeting site. I'm sincerely hoping that both girls will be good to me today so that I can take it easy. I will, however, have to make a trek to the market to get some cough drops or something. *sighs* I hate being sick. I'm just praying that neither of the girls gets what I have. Nothing more pitiful than sick kids.

Weight Loss Tracking

As most of you know, I have been going to Weight Watchers since February and have been (most days) following the plan rigidly. It has been hard, especially with cravings, but I know it will be worth it when I don't have to jump in the Plus section anymore. Well, I am proud to report the fruits of my labor---10.4 lbs lost! Woo hoo! And yes, I can tell a difference. My "fat" pants are getting baggy and my "regular" pants are fitting pretty well. I have a long way to go to get to my goal weight but, I now have the confidence to keep going. I may drop attending actual meetings 'cause other than weighing in (accountability factor), the meetings do nothing for me. I track my Points online anyway and am a message board a-holic, so maybe just doing it online will work. So, that's the latest!

I'm still around

I don't really have anything to post about at the present time but just wanted you folks to know that I haven't vanished off the face of the planet. I have been avidly reading and posting on CafeMom, reading and commenting on my friends' blogs, searching for a job (no luck yet) and trying to keep two little princess-divas somewhat happy. I am also researching loans/grants for grad school (Library Science) some day--figured I had better get my finances back on track first--and doing some reading. This all makes for a busy day, most of the time.

I hope to have some more interesting stuff to post about soon...

Oh, I did want to mention the cutest thing today. I put Cara in the big bathtub with Caitlin (I held & supported Cara, of course) and the two girls had a blast "floating" next to each other. At one point, Cara was riding on Caitlin's back (a total Kodak moment but I was occupied with keeping Cara from drowning, so no picture) with her chubby legs on either side of Caitlin as they swam "like Diego on the seat turtle up & down the length of the tub. Some good times had by both girls.

That's all folks. :)